- “Hmmm, she REALLY needs to get those roots done.”
- “Wow, she said thank you!”
- “Damn, he’s tall.”
- “DAMN! He’s short!”
- “I need 2 Advil liqui-gels…”
- “That walk-by-farting was un-called for.”
- “Some bad friend of hers lied to her and said, ‘girl you look good in those – wear THAT!'”
- “Oh that couple will make a good post later on tonight…”
- “Please stop kissing @ my bar for 20 consecutive minutes – her lungs need air and my customers need vodka with their olives…”
You’re drinking; okay. You’re flirting; fine by me. You’re dancing and enjoying the music; fuckin’ fan-tab-u-lous. You’re past tipsy but not quite wasted; I’ll call you a cab if need be. But why oh WHY do females feel the need to take their shoes off in a bar. A BAR. Do you know what’s on the floor in here? I know what’s lurking back here before we clean up @ night but my goodness…
Chicken wings, fry wedges, GLASS, spills, VOMIT, cigarettes and other QUESTIONABLE LIQUIDS. That’s just nasty. If your feet hurt, cop a squat or bring flats in those big ASS purses y’all bring to the place (which I also wonder why THAT is, but I digress…)
It’s nasty; don’t you have any home training?
Halloween. Time to dress up. Or down. Or in most cases for the women, undress.
It was a slow night and conversation sparse, but one in particular took place that sounded way to familiar. Dialogue that takes place every year about this time. Freak Fest, Ahoy!
To make a long story not so long, a group of Valley Girls were talkin ’bout who they were going as this year.
Why do chicks always make such a big deal about the little dental floss costume they’re going to wear this year. We need to rename Halloween, “Closet Whore Admiration Day.” Oh c’mon, that’s all it is people; and you know it. A lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom. It’s 2008 and by peoples behavior in the bar, they, well, let’s just say nothing’s forbidden anymore it seems.
I wish bitches quit being insecure about shit. If you like dick (or clits if the case may be) just be you; don’t have a ‘holiday’ be your excuse to dress down. If you feel comfortable dressing a certain way then let you be you.
It’s like people who always have sex in the bedroom and no other room in the house. Once a month. In the same position. In under 20 minutes.
Chickies, stop making excuses for wearing th fishnets and micro mini skirt or the ass-less chaps. If you aren’t comfortable with YOU, you may as well toss in the towel right now.
Whether you go home alone and wash your face of make-up or home with a partner and your “clothes” end up on the floor like a prom dress and you’re face down ass up – dress the way YOU want to dress and do it smartly.
…and Thank You.
P.S. On the same note, please ladies be FRIGGIN’ SMART when you’re out.
- DO NOT Drink beyond comprehension.
Watch you ass because not all your ‘friends’ are good friends.
I enjoy my patrons; really I do. I know many of my posts seem like complaining but really for the most part, they’re observations.
Case in point; you want a couple extra limes? Fine? 3-4 more cherries? Cool. But this is not the salad bar at the Sizzler. I mean c’mon. My garnishes are just that. GARNISHES. They are not there for you to eat. Nibble and suck maybe, but not to eat. Continuously. I had to say something.
“Are you hungry honey? You know we’re serving food, right? A Burger? A quesadilla? Some fries? I can’t have you eatin’ up everything in my fruit tray baby…”