My thoughts on any given weekend night working in WI

  • “Hmmm, she REALLY needs to get those roots done.”
  • “Wow, she said thank you!”
  • “Damn, he’s tall.”
  • “DAMN!  He’s short!”
  • “I need 2 Advil liqui-gels…”
  • “That walk-by-farting was un-called for.”
  • “Some bad friend of hers lied to her and said, ‘girl you look good in those – wear THAT!'”
  • “Oh that couple will make a good post later on tonight…”
  • “Please stop kissing @ my bar for 20 consecutive minutes – her lungs need air and my customers need vodka with their olives…”

Letter From Your Bartender from: Erin @ Gatsbys – NYC

“And here we have arrived at the so very complex concept of tipping. These are some basic rules when it comes to tipping properly, and please remember the only money that we make at work is from tips. My paycheck is literally “VOID” every week because at $3.70 an hour once taxes are taken out, there is actually zero left.

1. Tip 20% every time.
2. Tip on water orders.
3. Tip on free drinks
4. Tip at least $1 per free drink. Like I have stated before I make nothing off of sales, so whether it costs $15 a drink or nothing at all, I still need a tip.

It will help you to get your next one with lightning speed and a friendly smile.

“Another thing that I do not understand is guys flirting with me all night long, asking me out, scrawling their number on a napkin, and then NOT tipping me 20%. First off, I am not going to date anyone I meet as a customer at my bar, ever. I am especially not going to date someone so wasted that he sat there my entire nine hour shift staring at my chest, and mostly I am not going to even consider dating Prince Charming if he doesn’t even tip well! Also, for you guys, do not touch me, ever. What makes you think you can reach over the bar and touch my arm or hand? When I have to go to your office and ask to open a new bank account, and you get a phone call that interrupts the process, do I grab or caress your arm so that your attention comes back to me? No, so I ask for the same respect back.”

“Something nice that you can do to help you get quicker service is offer to buy me a shot. I will have one with you and I will probably charge you for it. But you will most likely end up getting quite a few shots back from me for free, so that in the end you will have spent less money and gotten more drunk, and I will be in a better mood overall. Everybody wins!”

Read On .

The Ten Commandments of Bartending

The following is a list of rules that is expected of all bar tenders.
They are the most important principles and skills needed to be a great bar tender, and they should never, EVER be violated.
  • I.  Thou shall always, ALWAYS keep the Bar Top Clean & sticky free.
  • II. Thou shall keep your Cool under pressure (Yes, even when the patrons are hootin’ and hollerin’ like a hog caller in heat.)
  • III. Thou shall be able to take a minimum of three drink orders at a time
  • IV. Thou shall Never ever count Tips in front of customers. (Seriously.  Really, I’m not kidding.  It’s tacky.)
  • V. Thou shall leave all  dramatic substances and bullshit at the Door.
  • VI. Thou shall treat each customer like a Royalty.
  • VII. Thou shall have a sense of humor, an outstanding personality and great LISTENER (SHUT UP once in awhile and let THEM talk…)
  • VIII. Thou shall always use speed and efficiency when mixing any cocktail
  • IX. Thou shall always remain organized and CLEAN UP behind their bar.
  • X. Thou shall use both hands at all times. (Two is better than one.)